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I'm so glad you're here! This is our story. God has lead us to adoption to build our family and here you will find my real and raw experiences with joys and triumphs as well as struggles and sadness. I hope you're encouraged by our story of God's faithfulness and His love for us!

Monday, October 31, 2011

A Not So Comforting Phone Call

After a weekend of waiting for a returned call and a day of playing phone tag I FINALLY got a hold of my social worker. I was hoping that it would be this wonderful conversation about how the mom has no chance and how it’s guaranteed that Dora will stay in our home. I’m afraid that is absolutely NOT how this conversation went. I am leaving it feeling like the only possible way that Dora will stay in our home is if God Himself intervenes. It’s always though talking with my worker because she doesn’t have all the information on Dora and her mom. She really only knows what I’m telling her and after our conversation she pretty much told me to prepare myself to loose her. But, I’m not giving up hope! God placed her in our family. I hate to believe that it was only for a season because I want it to be permanent! As I’m typing this I can feel the defeat just overcoming me. I’m not sad. Not angry. Just utterly defeated. Basically what she said was that this hearing is about mom doing everything that she was told she needed to do – which I believe she is about to finish. She is in a six step program and she is on step five. This hearing she told me isn’t about whether our home is a better home for Dora. It’s not about who is more qualified to be Dora’s parent or where Dora will be the most healthy. In fact, this hearing isn’t about Dora’s best interest at all. It’s all about mom and what she has done. Talk about a flawed system. Even the fact that she has had to previous children removed and rights terminated is no longer really affecting the decision because they gave her more time. Pretty much back in April when they gave her six more months the court was pretty much saying that they thought they would end up reunifying. I think Dora’s adoption worker was trying to say that that day on the phone back in April. I feel like this process has been really trying. You all have seen the ups and downs. All the things that were told me in argument for why Dora would end up in our care really have all come falling down around us and we’re left with really no reason why Dora would stay in our care. I’m struggling RIGHT NOW fighting the thoughts that we’ve lost her and she will become a child that we once loved and lost. Ok… tears are coming..


Our social worker is sending us paperwork to fill out to send to the courts telling them how well Dora is doing in our home, what she was like when she came to us and what she is like now so I’ll fill that out and get that to Dora’s social worker. It’s our little voice. I asked about a lawyer and she conferred with Dora’s adoption worker from back in April and they both said that it would be a waste of money because it’s not about us at all. She did say that we should be getting a visit from Dora’s lawyer before the 19th though so I’ll be calling about that because I ABSOLUTELY want that visit.


So here’s where we end up people. We’re in a hopeless situation but there is still HOPE! Because God Almighty, Creator of the Universe is still in control of this situation and with Him there is ALWAYS hope! I need to start preparing myself for her leaving. I need to start preparing my heart and Cinderella’s for the possibility, but I will never stop praying and working to keep her! There’s still time for mom to blow it. There’s still the judge’s decision to make. This decision is not final until it’s final! Even once it’s final she can still loose her again and we could end up right back where started. I don’t know what the future holds but I know that God promises good to those who love Him and are His children! My hope is in knowing that He has been faithful to me in the past and knowing that I can trust Him with my future. Please pray with me! Please be faithful to lift up our family as often as you can. I believe in the power of prayer. Through prayer miracles happen because we have a living God who listens to the prayers of His people!

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