So our first weekend with Dora is over and it went well. She has assimilated into our family really easily and I think she likes the activity and stimulation at our house. We took her to the zoo on Saturday and we were really excited about it. I wasn't sure she'd be able to find the animals, but she did and she'd point and say "dog." We were hoping that seeing all the animals and hearing their names would excite her to say them and she did say giraffe! That's not an easy word and it's encouraging that she's trying new words!
It's always sad taking her back to the foster home after having her, but I think that my perspective has changed. Once I got my focus off myself and what was best for me and what I think is best for Dora and realized that there are more people involved it really helped me to be content in the place where God has me right now. I can see so much better now how this transition time isn't just about her bonding with me and my family, but also letting go of her foster family and them letting go of her. It makes taking her back purposeful and I get to enjoy the transition time too with just Cinderella. I think Cinderella misses her the most when she's not here. She really gets it that Dora is part of our family and I couldn't ask for a more understanding and sweeter daughter who is patient as Dora steals her parent's attention at times.
Last night was an interesting night in our house. Dora was tired early, 7:15. So... I put her to bed early, only she decided not to fall asleep! She takes a while to wind down, so I didn't think anything of her talking and spent some time with Cinderella! She was still awake when I put Cinderella to bed. Not too long after putting both girls down Dora starts screaming loudly. I guess she just needed some snuggle time so we snuggled and fell asleep together on the love seat! Well, Cinderella fell asleep knowing Dora was out with me and she didn't sleep well at all. She woke up so many times throughout the night. Bryan got up with her for most of them, but finally I went in since every time she was calling for mommy. I asked her what was the matter and why she was crying and she said "I want Dora to come back." I told her Dora was sleeping in her bed and Cinderella immediately said ok and rolled over and went back to sleep. In the end Cinderella ended up getting her special snuggle time this morning in our bed since she kept waking up!
The closer we get to the move in date and the court date the more nervous I become. But then I realize how silly I am because worrying about it isn't going to change the outcome. I keep reminding myself of the passage in Luke where Jesus is talking about worry and He says.. "Can all your worries add a single moment to your life? And if worry can’t accomplish a little thing like that, what’s the use of worrying over bigger things?....Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and he will give you everything you need." So, I'm working hard to keep my heart and my mind focused on the goodness of God and His faithfulness to me in the past and expecting faithfulness and goodness in the future, even if that looks different than I think it should. It's a tough discipline to master and it's even harder to take every thought captive, but as tough as it is now. It will be so worth it in the future when I look back and see God's goodness and plan more fully than I can now. What I know about my God is that His plan for my life EXCEEDS my expectations and that He's trustworthy with my emotions, hopes, dreams AND children.
It's always sad taking her back to the foster home after having her, but I think that my perspective has changed. Once I got my focus off myself and what was best for me and what I think is best for Dora and realized that there are more people involved it really helped me to be content in the place where God has me right now. I can see so much better now how this transition time isn't just about her bonding with me and my family, but also letting go of her foster family and them letting go of her. It makes taking her back purposeful and I get to enjoy the transition time too with just Cinderella. I think Cinderella misses her the most when she's not here. She really gets it that Dora is part of our family and I couldn't ask for a more understanding and sweeter daughter who is patient as Dora steals her parent's attention at times.
Last night was an interesting night in our house. Dora was tired early, 7:15. So... I put her to bed early, only she decided not to fall asleep! She takes a while to wind down, so I didn't think anything of her talking and spent some time with Cinderella! She was still awake when I put Cinderella to bed. Not too long after putting both girls down Dora starts screaming loudly. I guess she just needed some snuggle time so we snuggled and fell asleep together on the love seat! Well, Cinderella fell asleep knowing Dora was out with me and she didn't sleep well at all. She woke up so many times throughout the night. Bryan got up with her for most of them, but finally I went in since every time she was calling for mommy. I asked her what was the matter and why she was crying and she said "I want Dora to come back." I told her Dora was sleeping in her bed and Cinderella immediately said ok and rolled over and went back to sleep. In the end Cinderella ended up getting her special snuggle time this morning in our bed since she kept waking up!
The closer we get to the move in date and the court date the more nervous I become. But then I realize how silly I am because worrying about it isn't going to change the outcome. I keep reminding myself of the passage in Luke where Jesus is talking about worry and He says.. "Can all your worries add a single moment to your life? And if worry can’t accomplish a little thing like that, what’s the use of worrying over bigger things?....Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and he will give you everything you need." So, I'm working hard to keep my heart and my mind focused on the goodness of God and His faithfulness to me in the past and expecting faithfulness and goodness in the future, even if that looks different than I think it should. It's a tough discipline to master and it's even harder to take every thought captive, but as tough as it is now. It will be so worth it in the future when I look back and see God's goodness and plan more fully than I can now. What I know about my God is that His plan for my life EXCEEDS my expectations and that He's trustworthy with my emotions, hopes, dreams AND children.
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